Monday, October 31, 2011

True Wholeness

"Wholeness - soul wellness - does not come to those are only half way committed to it. It is for the person who is tired of living for themselves or as a victim to their experiences...the one who desires to find their true identity... the one with worldly success who still longs fro more. Wholeness is available to the person who wants to no longer be defined or limited by anything and is willing to do whatever it takes to change."

~Lisa Whittle
"Choosing Well"
(Eccl. 10:2a)
All is Grace!

Thursday, October 27, 2011

"....think about such things."

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Phil 4:8

Do you do this? Regularly? Yeah, me either. 

One of my bible study readings this morning discussed how  we should hold our thoughts to higher standards, that we are often times haunted by thoughts that are in no way validated or true. 

“You are not liked.”
“Who are you to think you could do that?”
“Why did you say that? Everyone thinks you’re annoying (or stupid).”
“Your kids just illustrated every inadequacy you have as a mom.”
“You are invisible.”
"No one cares."

Maybe not these specifically but probably some similar creep into the tiny crevices of our mind and pop into our thoughts far too often. How dare we?!?! 
We are to think on, ponder and park our minds on constructive thoughts—not destructive thoughts. Thoughts that build up not tear down. Thoughts that breathe life not drain the life from us. Thoughts that lead to goodness not anxiety.

So, here are three questions we’d do well to ask ourselves when thoughts are dragging us down. (This I stole from my bible study. I couldn't have said it better :-)

1. Did someone actually say this or am I assuming they are thinking it?
If they actually said it, deal with it then. If I’m assuming it, that’s unfair to them and unnecessarily damaging to me. Instead of staying anxious, I need to seek truth by seeking God and asking Him for peace.

(Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.)

2. Have I been actively engaging with truth lately?
The more we read God’s truths and let truth fill our mind, the less time we’ll spend contemplating untruths.
Thinking run-away, worrisome thoughts invites anxiety. Thinking thoughts of truth wraps my mind in peace and helps me rise above my circumstances.

(And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.)

3. Are certain situations or friendships feeding my insecurities?
If so, maybe I need to take a break from these for a season.
I need to seek friendships that are characterized by truth, honor, and love.

(Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.)

Heavens, this is not easy. I know these issues can be more complicated than three simple questions. But holding our thoughts accountable is a fantastic place to start! 

God's Word tells us, what we think dictates how we live and who we are. Then ladies, may we think upon and live out truth—and only truth today.
I'll think back on Aug 11, 2010. Daddy and daughter together for the first time.
Dear Lord, reveal to me untruths throughout my day that can so easily distract and discourage me. Help me see You and Your truth in all I do. You have taught that only Your truth will set me free. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

All is Grace,

Wednesday, October 26, 2011


LOVE with this little munchkin!

This was her before church on Sunday. She practices her touchdown move all the time :-)


She had to take water breaks between touchdowns of course

Ready for the game!
"How do I look?"
 All is Grace!


Sunday, October 23, 2011

Amazing Love (and the most adorable halloween fairy ever!)

Many of you know I have spent the last month working in our  NICU (neonatal intensive care unit). It is a place filled with so many, heartache, struggle, fight, triumph, sadness and joy. Talk about a roller-coaster :-). Also as many of you know, it is one of my least favorite places to work. Well, it used to be. Not only is it a hard month for the reasons above but it is a month that takes me away from Matthew and Ryan quite a bit.

4 weeks ago I was DREADING being there. (I capitalized dreading because I cannot even begin to tell you how much I mean that word) However, our God is a big God and He did things in my heart over the past 4 weeks that only He could do. As the weeks wore on, I found myself praying over the babies, praying for myself, the nurses, the neonatolgisits, the parents, etc. I decided it was the only way I could survive without being completely depressed :-).

Well, one I realized something astonishing. I WAS HAPPY!!! And then I almost passed out, haha. God had completely changed my heart. It was the first time I had been up there and formed amazing relationships and bonds with the babies, their families and the staff. I loved it! I couldn't wait to see them everyday and help them (if I could). I seriously was laughing out loud in the middle of the unit when this realization hit me.

Now, I could never be a neonatologist but it is a place I will continue to pray for as I complete my training and years beyond. It takes wonderful, special people to work up there and even stronger families to endure the road with their baby fighting to live and grow.God also changed my heart about how I approach my calling in medicine and position as a physician. I have such a greater responsibility than simply helping heal physical needs. Now, this is something I've known with my head but never truly experienced with my heart...until this month. Thank you God! I hope that each month I am blessed to practice medicine I will remember this and practice it. 

I want to share one example of how God grew my faith this past month, just to give you a taste of what He did to my heart. I only feel comfortable sharing because the others involved shared the story with our entire church this morning and changed my heart forever.

During my first week on service, I happened to be on call and wandered over to the L&D "board". This board lists all of the women in labor, how many weeks along, complications, etc. In the unit, we look a lot at those under 35weeks because this means the baby will come visit with us for some time after they are born. I happen to notice a woman who was only 20wks along with the following after her name...IUFD or "intrauterine fetal demise". My heart right then completely broke for her and her family. As the night wore on I continued to pray for this woman I didn't know at all but knew she must be dying as her labored progressed. I thought about how she would deliver but her baby would not be living. He or she was already with Jesus.

I finished my call night and moved on. This was almost 4 weeks ago. This morning, Matthew and I were sitting in our worship service when a couple stood up to share how God had worked in one of the darkest moments of their life together. They shared how almost 4 weeks ago they went in for a routine ultrasound of their 5th child and later than night were put in the hospital to deliver a child who was already gone. They shared how awful a feeling to not hear a heartbeat they had heard at all previous visits, how wonderful the mother had felt during the pregnancy and how they already had a name. It was then that they shared their name and I gasped out loud, in the middle of the serivce. This was the same woman I prayed for almost all night. She was a member of my church, my fellowship and I didn't even know!!!

What an amazing God we serve and what an incredible Love, agape Love He gives and lavishes on us even on our darkest days and through our most difficult trials.

Thank you Father for changing my heart, growing my faith and allowing me the privilege to be your daughter!

Included are some pictures from our Halloween festivities thus far :-). Even more evidence of His Love...A beautiful healthy daughter and wonderful friends to share life with! I am one blessed girl indeed.
Happy Halloween to all!

All is Grace. His Grace.